1.
AQUIRING SEXUAL KNOWLEDGE
2.
CONDOM FACTS FOR ALL
SEXUALLY ACTIVE ADULTS
3.
Men, Women and Ejaculation:
A Quick Guide
4.
GETTING THE SEX THAT YOU
WANT: A QUICK GUIDE FOR LONG
TERM RELATIONSHIPS
5.
Becoming Orgasmic: A Woman’s
Guide
6.
GUIDE TO SEX TOYS
7.
GUIDE TO SEX TOYS FOR MEN
8.
SEX AND RELIGION IN AFRICA
9 .
FRIENDSHIP AND SEXUAL
GENEROSITY: THE SAVIOUR OF
RELATIONSHIPS
10.
Sexual Liberation: The Path
to Fulfillment
11.
SEXUAL WISDOM: A GUIDE TO
RECLAIMING OUR AFRICAN PRIDE
12.
SHORT CUTS TO SEXUAL
FULFILLMENT
13.
DOES SIZE REALLY MATTER?
14.
SEX PRODUCTS AND YOU:
UNDERSTANDING THE ZEE
VIRTUAL MEDIA AGENDA.
1. ACQUIRING
SEXUAL KNOWLEDGE
IS SEX EDUCATION IMPORTANT?
The answer to this question
might seem obvious, but our
general response to sex
speaks otherwise. We all
agree that education is
important. Of course. When
you turn on the radio, you
always here about the need
to use a condom and be
accepting of people living
with HIV and AIDS. Sure. But
talk is cheap. When it comes
to action, we are generally
not supportive of sex
education in this country.
It is true. Why do I say so?
Precisely because I
experience it everyday.
Before I started writing for
Sun Newspaper and Sensation
magazine, I made huge
efforts to have these
articles published in other
papers as well. I contacted
Genevieve Magazine, Punch
Newspaper and This Day
Newspaper. They all turned
it down. I was shocked. I
never asked them to pay me.
They cannot even afford to
pay me. All I wanted was to
get these articles published
so that lots of people can
have access to vital
information. My articles are
not vulgar. They are
educational. I gave them
samples of my essays and
adverts. They read them,
enjoyed them but still
turned down my proposals
while saying that ‘they do
not feature such things in
their publication’. Can you
believe that? Such senseless
arrogance…What exactly are
‘such things’? They can see
people dying of AIDS
everyday. They sound as if
they really care when the
cameras are on them. But
when it comes right down to
making strong and palpable
commitments towards the
eradication of sexual
illiteracy in this country,
they chicken out. What a
mess. What are we so afraid
of? Everybody has sex. Human
beings are sexual beings.
Big deal!
My generation will do things
differently. Our parents
told us lies about sex and
they thought they were
helping us. But they
weren’t. They never taught
us a single thing about sex.
They never even talked about
it. From broken marriages of
today to sexual diseases and
abuse of sorts, we are the
ones suffering from the
education parents never
gave. That’s fantastic isn’t
it? Now the media is doing
the same thing. The move to
ensure that nobody gets
educated is systematically
being fostered by the media.
But we must resist this
sickening attitude. We will
scream from the roof tops if
we have to but sex education
is a must. I thank God for
Sun Newspaper and Sensation
magazine for embracing this
educational feature with
open arms.
WHAT DOES SEX EDUCATION
ENTAIL?
The acquisition of vital
sexual information is a very
simple process. The books
and films that you need are
out there. We have some of
them at
www.zeevirtualmedia.com.
Also, each time you buy from
us, your order is
accompanied by free
newsletters on a variety of
sexual subjects written by
sex educators with doctorate
degrees. These news letters
are expensive to print but I
don’t regret it. We NEED
them. Books and movies on
every imaginable sexual
subject have been written by
concerned professionals and
entertainers overseas. That
is what I love about the
west. They take nothing for
granted and they value the
lives of their people. If
Americans were experiencing
the kind of AIDS epidemic
witnessed in Africa today,
by now they would have
declared a state of
emergency in their country.
Their government would be
going from house to house
giving away boxes of
condoms. Infact by now,
their government would have
put out a law saying that it
is illegal and criminal to
have sex without a condom.
Yes they will. That is how
seriously they take human
life over there. But here,
if you mention the word sex,
people will look at you as
if you are some kind of
devilish human being. Yet,
these same people are all
having sex.
THE BENEFITS OF SEX
EDUCATION
When you educate your self
through books and films,
there is hardly any kind of
sexual problem or challenge
that you cannot face.
Whether you are worried
about early ejaculation or
the fact that you have never
had an orgasm before, there
are books written just for
that. If it is sex positions
that you want to learn
about, there are tons of
books on that as well. We
have them at
www.zeevirtualmeida.com. We
have books on relationships,
married sex, sex positions,
sex games, organ
enlargement, sex toys, how
to be a better lover, safe
sex, sexual ailments, sex
therapy etc. The choice is
yours. You should see my own
personal library. I just
love knowledge. It is an
amazing asset. With sex
education, we can:
1- Protect ourselves from
all kinds of diseases.
2- Acquire information that
will aid our sexual
satisfaction and the success
of our marriages and
relationships.
3- Understand our bodies
better and get to know what
works for us and how to
achieve it.
4- Prolong sex for mutual
benefit.
5- Keep sex interesting for
as long as we live.
6- Be better lovers.
7- Understand different
sexual dysfunctions,
illnesses and their
solutions.
And so on. There is no end
to what we can gain from
educating ourselves. We have
nothing to loose by
acquiring relevant sexual
information. When I started
Zee Virtual media in
February this year, people
told me that nobody will buy
books because Nigerians
don’t read which I knew
already. We prefer
television to reading. But I
believed that the more we
talk about the importance of
education, people will
gradually begin to build up
their libraries and it is
happening already. I believe
it will continue and
gradually become a cultural
movement for our benefit.
Uche Edochie
MD
Zee Virtual Media
Go Back to TOP
2. CONDOM FACTS FOR ALL
SEXUALLY ACTIVE ADULTS
Of all adult sex products
used all over the world,
condoms are the most common
and certainly the most
popular. As a contraceptive,
condoms prevent millions of
pregnancies and for disease
control; they also shield
users from contacting a wide
range of sexually
transmitted diseases. In
essence therefore, condoms
are unarguably very
beneficial to all humans.
However, very little is
known about condoms in
general which explains why
we will always argue about
their success rate
especially regarding disease
prevention. Part of the
reason for this is that
whereas the general public
is perpetually urged to use
condoms always, through
radio, television and print
public announcements, there
has been no proper education
of the masses about condoms.
As a people, we know very
little about them and this
has contributed to wide
spread fears and rumours
about condom capabilities.
So, in line with our
commitment to sex education,
we at Zee Virtual Media are
publishing for the first
time comprehensive condom
facts that all sexually
active adults should know.
The first question on
everybody’s mind would be,
‘Can the HIV virus pass
through a condom? The answer
to that is yes and no. It
all depends on the type of
condom that you are using.
This answer must be very
confusing because we hear
different things about
condom safety everyday. In
this article, I will be
clearing up that confusion
once and for all. The first
thing we all need to know
about condoms are the
different types that there
are and by different types,
I am not talking about
brands of condoms such as
Durex, Lifestyles etc. I am
referring to the materials
these condoms are made of.
Essentially there are three
kinds of condoms in
circulation. They are:
A. Latex Condoms
B. Skin Condoms
C. Polyurethane Condoms
LATEX CONDOMS
In order to know which one
is which, always look at the
packet of the condom itself.
The condom type will be
written on it. Here is a
brief on latex condoms. They
are the most popular condoms
around and if you are a
regular condom user (as you
should be), chances are that
you have used latex condoms
before. Research shows that
latex condoms are arguably
the safest of these
different types because of
the size of the pores found
in the latex material
itself. These studies also
show that the pores in
question are smaller than
the sperm cell and the HIV
virus thereby making it a
formidable option in the
prevention of unwanted
pregnancies, HIV and other
sexually transmitted
deceases. If you use good
quality latex condoms
properly and consistently,
you have nothing to worry
about.
SKIN CONDOMS
Skin condoms are yet another
type of condoms made from a
natural pouch in lamb
intestines. They are more
expensive than latex condoms
and are designed for people
who are allergic to latex,
spermicide or the lubricant
that latex condoms are made
of. The membranes of skin
condoms are especially
strong and research shows
that they are the most
sensitive and arguably the
most enjoyable of them all.
Unfortunately when screened
under the microscope, skin
condoms were found out to
have larger pores than the
average latex condoms. This
is bad news because whereas
the pores of skin condoms
are half the size of sperm
cells and therefore are
effective in preventing
pregnancies, these pores are
still wider than the viruses
and some bacteria
responsible for a wide range
of sexually transmitted
diseases. To cut a long
story short, skin condoms
maybe good for people who
are allergic to latex
condoms and they certainly
help prevent unwanted
pregnancies, but they are
not designed for disease
prevention. Scientific study
shows that the HIV, herpes
and hepatitis-B viruses can
pass through skin condoms.
Now you understand why there
is a general statement that
condoms are not 100% disease
proof. It is because of
these different materials of
which they are made of. The
average poll that lumps all
these condom types together
will tell you that condoms
in general have a 12%
failure rate. The reality of
the matter is that good
latex condoms have a 2%
failure rate, making them
very reliable indeed. All
condoms sold at
www.zeevirtualmedia.com are
latex condoms.
POLYURETHANE CONDOMS
This condom is the most
recent type to enter the
market and an example of it
is the Avanti condom brand.
They are made of a synthetic
material and they are
generally shorter than other
condoms in length. Although
the manufacturers of this
product claim that they are
very effective for pregnancy
and decease prevention,
comprehensive test results
are still underway. Only
time and comprehensive
independent research will
tell. Avanti condoms are
expensive and some users say
that they feel like wearing
nothing at all which is a
plus, considering that
condoms in general reduce
sexual enjoyment.
APPROPRIATE CONDOM USE
Generally speaking, condoms
do break once in a long
while, making them a cause
for concern. Research
reveals that the higher
quality condoms are less
likely to break during use.
A lot of the time, condoms
break as a result of
inappropriate use. To avoid
such accidents, here are
steps you must follow:
a. Open an individual packet
of condom when you are ready
to use it and do so gently
to avoid tearing the
content. Always check for
expiring dates before use.
If a condom is older than
three years, don’t use it.
If a condom feels brittle,
sticky or looks discoloured,
throw it away. It is spoilt.
b. Always unroll a condom
down the entire length of
the penis (uncircumcised men
should first pull back their
foreskins).
c. Do not wear a condom
inside out. Always study it
carefully to see the
direction in which the
condom unrolls before
wearing. Better still, read
and follow the directions
contained therein if you get
confused.
d. The tip of a condom is
normally shaped to contain
semen after ejaculation.
When you wear your condoms,
always leave this little
space at the end to enable
the semen collect when you
ejaculate.
e. Right after ejaculation,
grab the condom firmly at
the ringed base and pull it
off before loosing your
erection in order to avoid
spillage.
f. Store your condoms in a
cool, dry place. Heat, light
and air pollution can all
hasten deterioration.
g. For additional condom
lubrication that will make
penetration easier and
painless, always use water
based lubricants which you
can get at
www.zeevirtualmedia.com.
Petroleum jelly and mineral
oil products rapidly weaken
latex. Avoid those.
h. It is generally said that
condoms should be used for
vaginal intercourse but it
shouldn’t stop there. For
effective decease
prevention, condoms should
be used to for oral, rectal
and vaginal intercourse as
this shields the body from
contact with infected body
fluids coming from any of
these areas.
If a condom breaks during
usage, both partners should
quickly wash their genitals
with soap and water.
Urinating immediately may
also help to avoid
infections. If the breakage
occurs after ejaculation,
apply a spermicide or see a
pharmacist to prescribe
appropriate contraceptive
pills for you. There are
birth control pills that
will prevent pregnancy when
used within 72 hours of
intercourse.
In conclusion, latex condoms
are the safest of all
condoms and if used
consistently and correctly,
pregnancies and a wide range
of sexually transmitted
deceases can be effectively
prevented. I hope you find
this article useful.
Uche Edochie
MD
Zee Virtual Media
Go Back to TOP
3. Men, Women and
Ejaculation: A Quick Guide
Male and female ejaculation
is one issue that is very
central to human sexuality.
This is because the
implications are many. Take
male ejaculation for
instance. If a man
ejaculates, he is considered
virile. If he ejaculates
early, he is seen as
unskilled and useless as far
as pleasuring women is
concerned. Infact, early
ejaculation is considered an
illness in a lot of circles,
which is wrong and we will
be addressing this issue.
And then of course, there is
the myth of female
ejaculation. I say ‘myth’
because a lot of people have
never witnessed it, so there
is a lot of speculation and
curiosity about female
ejaculation. Just in case
you are wondering if women
do ejaculate, yes they do.
Female ejaculate feels and
looks like urine but it is
not. It usually gushes- a
bit like an eruption and it
is such a beautiful thing to
watch. Some women ejaculate
fluid, while a lot of others
do not. If you don’t
ejaculate, that’s fine.
There is nothing wrong with
you.
Male ejaculation however is
our focus today and is of
greater consequence than
female ejaculation of
course. If a man is not
ejaculating, babies cannot
be made. The issue of
ejaculation is a huge source
of concern for most men,
because a man’s ability to
delay his ejaculation is his
source of sexual pride-
besides the size of his
penis and his ability to
bring a woman to climax. And
it doesn’t end there. Women
rate a man’s level of sexual
usefulness based on his
ability to prolong his
erection, amongst other
skills. But the major issue
concerning the penis is what
is widely referred to as
‘premature ejaculation’,
which is a silly term if you
understand that the
essential idea of
intercourse is procreation.
Have you ever timed dogs or
chickens when they are
mating? If so, do they stay
up to two minutes? Of course
not! Why? Because the male
specie is built to ejaculate
rapidly shortly after
penetration, just to ensure
that nothing stands in the
way of this natural process
of procreation. That is the
whole idea. To ensure that
the woman you are having sex
with does not change her
mind and decide to go and
cook or do something else
just before you climax, your
ejaculation is designed to
be rapid. It is not an
illness. Infact, the only
reason time is a factor
during sex is because it
takes women a long time to
get aroused and an even
longer time to have an
orgasm. Otherwise, who will
be talking about premature
ejaculation? If the average
woman could achieve sexual
satisfaction and orgasm
within five minutes, who
would care about rapid male
ejaculation? ‘Premature
Ejaculation’ is an incorrect
term that ridicules the
average ejaculatory period
of most men. If as we all
know, it takes the average
man four minutes of deep
vaginal penetration to
climax, mathematically, how
early does one have to
ejaculate to be classified
as a premature ejaculator?
You see my point? We can
talk about the need to
‘delay ejaculation’ for the
benefit of women. But when
you use the term ‘curing
premature ejaculation’, you
make perfectly healthy
people feel as if they are
suffering from an illness
which is not true.
So the issue here is the
need to prolong sex for the
benefit of women, which is a
whole new subject
altogether. Man’s ability to
delay his ejaculation hardly
comes naturally. It requires
skill and the use of certain
products. Do not be fooled
by porn stars that have
onscreen sex for long
periods of time. Most of
them use erection enhancers
and besides, the directors
of these movies do different
takes and make onscreen sex
appear longer! In reality,
an average healthy guy does
not take that long to
climax. So please, we need
to start changing the way we
perceive and talk about
ejaculation.
There are several ways one
can delay his ejaculation
and prolong his erection.
Below are the very common
ones.
Sex Positions: There are
several sex positions that
prevent deep penetration and
aid longer erections. You
can learn these from the
appropriate books and films
available at
www.zeevirtualmedia.com .
Cock Rings: A cock ring is a
sex toy that prevents the
penis from going limp after
ejaculation. It is cheap,
easy to use and very
effective.
Outercourse: Outercourse is
a term referring to any form
of sexual play that is not
vaginal intercourse. As you
know, the vagina is easily
the most exciting place that
man can put his penis, which
is part of the reason men
ejaculate quickly. However,
there is oral sex, hand jobs
and other forms of love
making that do not involve
vaginal intercourse. You can
start with these for several
minutes before vaginal
penetration. That way, your
love making will appear
longer.
Desensitizing Creams and
Sprays: These are very
common and this is how they
work. Most of them contain a
chemical component called
benzocaine which numbs and
desensitizes the penis,
thereby delaying
ejaculation. One of the most
popular of these products is
a cream called Love Stuff
All Night Long Erection
Cream. It is our best
selling erection enhancer at
www.zeevirtualmedia.com .
There is also a balm called
Kamasutra Pleasure Balm
which gives erections and
delays ejaculation as well.
Aphrodisiacs: Generally
speaking, an aphrodisiac is
any substance that puts you
in the mood for sex, while
giving the needed erection.
Ask for a product called
Dickalisious Penis Arousal
Gel. It helps you get it up,
even if you are not in the
mood for sex. The product
Herbal Viva is also very
popular and helps restore
stamina and low libido.
Always remember that sex is
about fun, play and
rekindling desire for one
another. It is a celebration
of your love and attraction
to each other and a source
of emotional connection and
sensual therapy. That is
what Marvin Gaye was talking
about when he sang ‘Sexual
Healing’. Focus on all of
these. Prolonging
ejaculation is okay, but
don’t obsess about it. When
round one ends, there is
always round two which
usually lasts longer, and
you’ve got your sex toys to
fall back on anyway.
Uche Edochie
MD
Zee Virtual Media
Go Back to TOP
4. GETTING THE SEX THAT YOU
WANT: A QUICK GUIDE FOR LONG
TERM
RELATIONSHIPS
If you have
ever been in a long term
relationship, married or
not, you will agree that sex
gets progressively
difficult. When you find
yourself in such a
situation, the right steps
have to be taken, otherwise
your relationship and family
(if you have one) will be
destroyed by this. Always
remember this; most people
in long term relationships
are having it rough. Very
rough. You don’t want to be
them, at all.
Statistics show that the two
major causes of divorces are
money and sex. Money comes
first and sex second. I am
not a financial expert so if
you are having money
problems, you might want to
talk to the likes of Aliko
Dangote. As for sex, well,
that’s what I am here for.
Let us begin by
understanding why long term
sexual satisfaction is so
difficult. Generally
speaking, modern life as we
know it today is very
demanding, not just in
Africa but everywhere else.
The long tedious hours spent
at work, the money that
never seems to be enough,
the lack of electricity,
fuel etc. just weigh you
down, not to talk of coming
home to a house full of
screaming kids. All these
challenges just attack and
steal the life you once had
or hoped for. The other big
killers of our sex lives are
change and familiarity with
our lovers. As the years
pass bye, we get burdened
with work and all kinds of
responsibilities. Under such
conditions, we loose focus,
stop taking care of
ourselves and cease to be
exciting. It is at times
like this that our husbands
or wives accuse us of
becoming different people,
and they are right. People
change.
The big question however is
what to do when this
happenss. WE ADAPT AND
CHANGE STRATEGY. That is
what we do. If you do not
remember anything else
discussed in this article,
please remember the word
ADAPTATION. That is the key.
Adapt or you are finished.
You cannot always expect
what worked for you five
years ago to work now. Here
is an example. A lot of
women complain about not
being in the mood for sex
nowadays because of all the
things happening in their
lives. While this is
understandable and makes
perfect sense, there is
still a problem here. Your
sexual relationship will
definitely suffer if you are
hardly in the mood, so you
need to do something about
it. CHANGE YOUR STRATEGY.
How do we change strategy?
Here are a few suggestions.
There is the option of
making a schedule for sex.
Every week, we make the
difficult decision of having
to wake up, bathe, dress up
and feed the kids and
ourselves and then proceed
to drop them off at school,
and continue all the way to
our work place. What stops
us from working sex into our
weekly schedules? It can be
done and people are doing
it. Surely, routine sex
can’t be that tough! Hello!
Sex is fun, remember? I know
that some of you will argue
that routine sex is not all
that enjoyable. That is how
it seems at first, but I can
assure you that if every
couple had routine sex a
minimum of three times a
week, our relationships will
shed half the baggage it
carries with it. If people
had sex regularly, even if
it was for five minutes a
session, they wouldn’t feel
so frustrated, neglected and
unloved. Besides, scheduling
sex is similar to scheduling
dinner in a restaurant or
scheduling going to the
cinema on a weekend. It is
exciting and it is something
you look forward to. Fixing
a time for something creates
anticipation and excitement
which puts you in the mood
when the time comes. It is
not difficult. It just
requires commitment.
There are other ways of
getting in the mood as well,
but we will talk about just
two of them in brief. One is
through Movies and the other
through Aphrodisiacs. As
controversial as this might
sound, there is no bigger
turn-on than watching other
people having sex. Movies
are what I like to call
‘visual aphrodisiacs’. They
put you in the mood
instantly which is amazing.
Oral aphrodisiacs such as
Spanish fly and Herbal Viva
also put you in the mood,
wherever and whenever you
want. But you must check
with your doctor to confirm
that you are healthy enough
to take these supplements.
Now that we’ve seen the
possibilities that
adaptation holds, let us use
this knowledge to tackle a
few common complaints.
Complaint number one: I get
back from work and I am
exhausted. I just manage to
eat, shower and fall asleep.
I don’t have time for sex.
Uche says: You can do two
things:
A. Schedule sex in the
mornings before you run off
to work. You can do it in
the shower. B. Screw like
rabbits on the weekends. You
can do it all day. Any
questions?
Complaint number two: My
husband complains that ever
since we had the kids, I
never make out time for him
anymore. But he should know
that the children need all
our attention. I can’t help
it. My children are my major
focus right now.
Uche says: Is that so? Some
day, you just might wake up
without a husband! And if he
is still with you as we
speak, it is very likely
that he is sleeping with
someone else! How do you
like that? Ladies please
hear this: Your children
cannot be your entire life.
That is not a balanced life.
There is more to your life
than just your kids. Your
life is about you, your
kids, your husband, your
work, your passion in life,
your natal family, your God,
society and so on. Human
lives are multi-dimensional
and every aspect is
important and needs our
attention. There is
something we fail to realize
about kids. Even though our
children are very much a
part of our lives, they are
also PASSING THROUGH our
lives. Children are born and
then they grow up and take
off to settle down
elsewhere. If you make your
kids your entire life, not
only will this destroy your
marriage, but when the kids
grow up and leave, you will
feel an emptiness that is
worse than anything you have
ever felt before. You had a
life before the kids came
along. Invest in your
marriage and you will have a
life after the kids have
gone. Trust me; you do not
want to grow old alone.
Let us be brutally honest
here. We inconvenience
ourselves all the time just
to make our children happy.
When a kid wakes up by
2:00am in the morning and
cries for food, Mummy always
gives up her precious sleep
to go and fix the kid
something to eat. If mummy
made one fifth of this
sacrifice when daddy needs
some loving, you will be
amazed at the results. It
can be done. People have
tried it and it worked! Give
him a five minute hand job
if you are not in the mood
for sex. How difficult is
that? A quick blow job
wouldn’t hurt either. What
will it take from you? You
don’t have to be in the mood
to do any of these things.
Just pretend as if you are
washing dishes or something
and in a few minutes, daddy
will cum and you can go back
to whatever it is you were
doing previously. We need to
get creative. Great
relationships just fall
apart for nothing. It
doesn’t make sense.
Complaint number three: My
husband is only nice when he
wants to have sex. I find it
difficult to have sex with
him when I am feeling
offended and neglected. I
just cannot bring myself to
be with him sexually under
such circumstances.
Uche Says: In fairness to
all people, particularly
women, the human libido is
tied to the emotions. Guys
don’t be nice only when you
want some booty. It is not
sexy, it is not fair and it
will not work. When people
are feeling bad because of
the way you treat them, they
cannot have sex with you, no
matter how they try. Be nice
all the time. If you cannot
be nice, fake it! But if you
really care about someone,
be a source of joy to them,
not misery.
Complaint number four: I am
always the one to initiate
sex in my relationship. My
wife hardly does so. Infact,
if I am not requesting for
sex, we wouldn’t even have a
sex life in the first place.
I am beginning to doubt if
my wife is still sexually
attracted to me. I don’t
think she loves me.
Uche Says: This is such a
common problem and it is not
about attraction or love.
Have you ever wondered why
women are referred to as the
opposite sex? Women are
complete opposites of men in
every way. Based on this
fact, if men want sex very
often, it is only natural
that women will not want it
that often. That is just
human nature. The
testosterone levels in men
just make them perpetually
horny and no woman can match
that. This explains why you
keep on putting pressure to
make her change but not much
happens. Men should focus
more on getting laid in the
first place and forget about
who initiates it. If you get
it when you request it,
that’s not an altogether bad
deal. Women are never going
to be everything you want
them to be, and neither can
you be everything they want
you to be. But ladies,
please try to initiate
things too. I know it is
difficult but you’ve got it
in you. I believe in you.
Such efforts mean a lot to
your partners. It helps with
their self esteem and the
success of your
relationships depends on it.
This is also one of the
major reasons sex toys were
invented. Sex toys for men
are vagina- like toys which
enable men get off as often
as the need arises without
having to fight with their
girls all the time or cheat
on them. At
www.zeevirtualmedia.com ,
you can purchase a variety
of these toys, movies and
lubricants that go with
them. They have helped my
own marriage immensely.
Uche Edochie
MD/CEO
ZEE Virtual Media
Go Back to TOP
5. Becoming Orgasmic: A
Woman’s Guide
Amongst all human sexual
desires, there is nothing
more elusive than the female
orgasm. It is one sexual
experience that is desired
by all women but experienced
by a few. The female orgasm
is the peak of sexual
euphoria. It is the male
equivalent of climaxing
during intercourse. It is
not common, and for the
lucky few who get to
experience it, it takes some
time to get there- an
average of twenty minutes to
be precise. This is why sex
experts conclude that it
takes more than mere vaginal
penetration to bring a woman
to orgasm, and they are
absolutely right. How long
does the average man last
anyway?
So, how can an orgasm be
achieved, you might wonder?
Is there a short cut? Why
are orgasms so difficult?
Can non-orgasmic women
become orgasmic? How does a
woman know when she has had
an orgasm? Is an orgasm an
absolute necessity in sexual
intercourse? These are
important questions that
constitute today’s topic. We
will start with the last
question and move backwards.
An orgasm is not an absolute
necessity during sexual
intercourse because a lot of
women are able to enjoy sex
without it. Experts will
tell you that when it comes
to the female sexual
experience, it is the
journey that counts, not
necessarily the destination,
and a lot of women will
agree. From a male point of
view however, if I begin a
journey, I will like to get
to my destination because….
well, let us just say that I
might run out of fuel,
amongst other things. It
must be tiring to just drive
around non stop without
getting to a destination.
This is not to say that
women should be dissatisfied
with the sex they are
getting if an orgasm is not
attached to it. I am just
saying that if it is
possible for women to reach
orgasms when they have
intercourse or masturbate,
why settle for less? Today,
I will be giving tips that
will enable you get there.
The next question will be,
‘How does a woman know when
she has had an orgasm?’ At
some point during sexual
stimulation, whether through
intercourse, self pleasuring
or a combination of both, a
woman’s body gets very
tense. A lot of women quiver
uncontrollably when in this
state, which can last
anywhere from one to twenty
minutes. This state of
sexual ecstasy is known as
hyper tonicity and most
women never get beyond it,
infact, western studies do
indicate that only about
thirty five percent of women
do have orgasms. I must
remind you however, that
these numbers refer
specifically to western
women. In Africa where our
women are less liberated,
the number of orgasmic women
is even lower. Anyway, for
the few women who are able
to cross this stage of hyper
tonicity into the orgasmic
phase, the experience has
been described as ‘a rush of
warm feelings’, ‘waves of
ecstasy’ and an ‘explosion
of pleasure’ amongst other
things. When in this state,
the pelvic muscles contract
intensely and some women do
ejaculate fluid. This is
known as ‘squirting’ in the
adult dictionary, and an
even lesser number of
orgasmic women do squirt.
Why are orgasms so
difficult? Can non orgasmic
women become orgasmic? With
practice and the right
products, non orgasmic women
can become orgasmic. As for
the second question,
following the theory of
opposites, the female orgasm
is difficult to reach
because male ejaculation is
easy. That is the simplest
way I can put it. Men and
women are opposites.
Is there a short cut to
orgasms? I am happy to
announce that the answer to
this is, ‘absolutely!’ With
a combination of a vibrator,
a clitoral stimulating gel
and the right frame of mind,
you can achieve multiple
orgasms when you desire it.
You can purchase these
vibrators and gels at
www.zeevirtualmedia.com. As
for the right frame of mind,
this can be induced with the
right kind of adult movie
which you can also purchase
at www.zeevirtualmedia.com .
We’ve got a stunning variety
of films for all kinds of
people.
How can this orgasm be
achieved? Below is a
comprehensive path to its
achievement:
1- Liberation: Sexual
liberation is the key to
sexual enjoyment. If like
most African women you were
raised to believe that sex
is bad and dirty, then it is
only normal if you struggle
with your sexual expression.
I will do a full article on
sexual liberation later on.
However, for the record, sex
is neither bad nor dirty.
2- State Of Mind: It may
seem as if ‘sexual
liberation’ and a person’s
‘state of mind’ is the same
thing, but not quite. In
order to enjoy sex, it helps
to prepare your mind by
thinking about sex, looking
forward to it and
fantasizing about it. Women
do not get in the mood
easily, quite unlike men. So
sexual anticipation and
fantasy helps put you in the
right receptive and
expressive mood.
3- Self Stimulation: This is
also known as masturbation
and EVERYBODY engages in
some form of masturbation or
the other, which is okay.
The one thing we must all
understand about self
stimulation is that it is
the most reliable way that a
woman can truly find out
what pleases her. A lot of
women complain that they do
not enjoy sex. I advice that
you explore your own body
and find out what you like
and where your erogenous
zones are. That way you can
tell your partner
specifically what pleases
you. Our women tend to lie
back and expect pleasure to
come their way. No. Nothing
good comes easy. If you want
something, you have to find
out what it is and how to
achieve it. Then you can
request for it from your
partner. Bear in mind that
because men ejaculate
quickly, you cannot expect
to orgasm in five minutes as
well. When your partner
climaxes before you orgasm,
there is no problem. The sex
does not have to end there.
You can continue your sexual
journey through self
stimulation, either with a
vibrator or with your
fingers till you reach
orgasm. Alternatively, you
can have your partner
stimulate you with his
hands, tongue or vibrator
till you climax as well.
4- Partner: It definitely
helps to have a partner who
is gifted in the bedroom.
All men are not born equal
as far as sexual knowledge
is concerned. However,
sexual skill is something
everybody can learn. It is
about practice and learning
from the right sources. We
have books and films to
teach you at
www.zeevirtualmedia.com.
5- Products: Like I have
mentioned earlier, there are
several products designed to
enable women enjoy sex to
the point of orgasms such as
vibrators, clitoral
stimulating gels, movies,
books and aphrodisiacs.
We’ve got them all at
www.zeevirtualmedia.com.
So, the above is a quick
guide to becoming orgasmic.
Remember also that during
intercourse or self
stimulation, direct
stimulation of the CLITORIS
gives the best results.
Uche Edochie
MD
Zee Virtual Media
Go Back to TOP
6. GUIDE TO SEX TOYS
Definition
A sex toy is any object made
specifically for the purpose
of sexual stimulation.
Ordinarily, humans engage in
all manner of sexual
stimulation before and
during intercourse, usually
with the hands, tongue, lips
and feet. Sex toys were
invented to enable us do
better what we are doing
already. For example, sexual
stimulation with a vibrator
is a whole lot better than
using your bare hands.
That’s how come sex toys are
so useful and essential.
These toys are very relevant
in a lot of ways, especially
regarding their ability to
enable us achieve sexual
release frequently, easily
and whenever the need
arises, regardless of
whether our partner is in
the mood or not. That way,
your sexual satisfaction is
not completely dependent on
a partner’s disposition or
ability. They are also
effective additions to your
sexual routines with your
partner because they add
variety and aid sexual
efficiency in your love
making.
Sex Toy Types
There are two broad
categories of toys out
there. There are toys for
men and there are toys for
women. There are also those
toys that can be used by
both men and women such as
the anal toys and vibrating
bullets/ eggs.
Toys For Women
The largest categories of
toys in production are
actually the ones made for
women. One would think that
because men are the hornier
sex, there would be more
male toys in the market but
the opposite is the case.
Toys for women are usually
meant for vaginal, clitoral,
anal or breast stimulation.
The toys for clitoral
stimulation are easily the
most popular for obvious
reasons. The clitoris is
that feminine body part that
harbors the highest
concentration of nerve
endings. That’s why it is
most responsive to touch.
Vaginal Toys
Dildos: A dildo is any
phallic shaped toy intended
for sexual stimulation. They
are usually made of hard
substances and some of them
vibrate while others don’t.
The plastic, silicone and
jelly dildos are usually the
more affordable and common
ones whereas the glass
versions are more
fashionable and expensive.
Dongs: Very often, people
are unable to tell the
difference between dildo’s
and dongs. The tendency is
to call them whatever name
comes to mind, but there is
a basic difference. Dongs
are realistic looking and
are soft like real penises.
Dildos are hard and do not
look realistic. There are
also different types and
sizes of dongs out there,
all of which are made of a
substance called cyber skin.
Cyber skin is a synthetic
substance that looks and
feels like real skin. It is
commonly used for the
manufacture of dongs and
masturbators. Like dildos,
there are vibrating and non
vibrating dongs. Vibrating
dongs are usually better
than the non vibrating
variety because they are
multi purpose toys. If you
turn them on, they vibrate
and if you switch them off,
they become non vibrating
toys. The whole idea behind
the vibrations is to aid
effective clitoral
stimulation.
Clitoral Stimulators:
Clitoral stimulators are non
penetrative but vibrating
toys intended for the
stimulation of the clitoris.
There are different types of
clitoral stimulators. Some
are oval shaped; some are
shaped like a tongue or the
lips while others come as
underwear! Imagine putting
on underwear that vibrates
and stimulates you to orgasm
while you are sleeping,
watching a movie, cooking or
working in the office! It’s
amazing!
Anal Toys: Anal toys are
usually slimmer than regular
dildos and dongs, and some
of them are angled to honor
rectal contours. Their
popularity is growing as
well and many men and women
are able to buy and
incorporate them into their
sexual routines. Provided
the issue of hygiene is well
addressed, anal stimulation
is just as good as any.
Guidelines For Buying
Vibrators
Size: If you are buying a
toy for the first time, it
is usually best that you
start with an average sized
toy. A seven inch toy would
be perfect for you. As time
goes on, you can go for
bigger and longer ones. The
three, four and five inch
toys are also great and more
affordable, but they are
best for clitoral
stimulation only. You
wouldn’t want a toy that
might accidentally slip in
and disappear into your
vagina. Bringing it out
might be difficult. To avoid
such accidents, smaller toys
are usually built with a
wide and flared base so they
can’t fall in. Be on the
look out for such.
Speed: Some vibrating toys
have single speeds while
others have multiple speeds.
Multiple speed toys are best
because they enable you
regulate and choose what
speed fits your mood.
Intended Use: Another
guiding factor for choosing
which toy to buy is how you
intend to use it. If you are
buying a toy that is meant
for you alone (with no
sexual partner in sight), it
is best to go for toys that
do all the work. I am
talking about toys that
penetrate the vagina and
stimulate the clitoris at
the same time. An example of
a toy that does this is the
Rabbit series. They are
built with the standard
shaft and an extension that
is shaped like rabbit ears
which are strictly dedicated
to clitoral stimulation.
Their tips also rotate for
internal G spot stimulation.
Rabbit vibrators are simply
the best in the world.
Another good toy for solo
action is any rubber-like
penis shaped toy with a
bulging base for clitoral
stimulation. That way, when
you insert it into the
vagina, you can also twist
the base forward to hug and
stimulate the clitoral hood.
Such toys usually have their
vibrating mechanisms located
at the base rather than the
middle of the shaft, unlike
the regular vibrators.
However, if you have a
sexual partner and you are
buying a toy to add to your
sexual routine, then the
regular phallic shaped toy
is okay. With any of this,
you can place the vibrator
on the clitoris while your
partner is inside you. It is
an effective combination
that enables women enjoy sex
to the point of multiple
orgasms and we highly
recommend you get one.
Function: The functions of a
vibrator also determine the
choices you make. All
vibrators essentially
vibrate. However, some
others have extra features
such as in and out
thrusting, spinning, multi
speed vibration and
rotation, dedicated clitoral
stimulation, battery
operated, rechargeable,
internet enabled, iPod
compatible, cell phone
compatible and so on. Always
make the necessary enquiries
before choosing which one to
buy.
Uche Edochie
MD/CEO
Zee Virtual Media
www.zeevirtualmedia.com
Email:
zeevirtualmedia@yahoo.com
Go Back to TOP
7. GUIDE TO
SEX TOYS FOR MEN
Definition
A SEX TOY is any object made
specifically for the purpose
of sexual stimulation. There
are different types of toys
out there with different
functions. Some of them
enable you maintain a strong
erection even after
ejaculation (Cock Rings)
while others enable you self
stimulate to ejaculation
(masturbators and love
dolls).
Purpose
Explaining the usefulness of
sex toys is a bit strange
because it is quite obvious.
However, for the purpose of
our sex education, we will
discuss every aspect of our
subject in detail. If you
are an adult, chances are
that you are already aware
of the gap in male and
female sexual appetites. Men
want sex often quite unlike
women, and the reason for
this is simple. Men harbor
large amounts of a chemical
substance in the body known
as testosterone; a substance
that makes them perpetually
randy and more sexually
enthusiastic than women. To
imagine that all this while,
society made us think that
men are just wayward and
sexually irresponsible;
whereas the reason for man’s
sexual eagerness has always
been biological.
Man’s greatest sexual wish
has always been the ability
to have sex whenever he
wants it. Sadly, this is one
wish that will never come to
be because man will never be
able to get his female
partner to match his sexual
appetite. He has tried and
failed and in the process,
what does he do? He cheats
with other women, lies about
it, gets caught and ruins
his relationship and family-
for those with families. And
sometimes, man brings home
HIV and other diseases. Even
men who have not cheated
physically have cheated
emotionally with other
women. I am sure you do, but
just incase you find the
term confusing, let me break
it down for you. Do you
remember what it feels like
to be simultaneously
attracted to two or more
women, even though you have
a wife or girlfriend? Deep
within you, the desire to be
with these other women is
really strong but due to
‘technical difficulties’
(the wife or girlfriend),
you are unable to get
physical with them. But in
your imagination, you have
made crazy love to these
other women a million times-
in the shower, in an
elevator, in the office
after work, in a deserted
island or a hotel etc. Now
that is emotional cheating
and men and women
participate in it equally.
Life is not easy, as you all
know. Being a man and having
to play by the rules is even
more difficult. There were
days when I felt like
cutting off my own penis!
The damn thing just annoys
me sometimes. Imagine having
to wake up some mornings
with an erection and you are
not even thinking about sex!
It is as if your penis has a
mind of its own. You wake up
and you want to go to work,
but your penis wants to stay
back and have sex. It’s
crazy! A few years ago, an
angry ant once climbed up my
trousers, bit me on my penis
and gave me a monstrous
erection for hours! My wife
kept laughing at me because
I was stuck in the bedroom
and couldn’t go outside. I
didn’t want to scare
anybody. Nobody wants to see
a guy with a hard on walking
the streets! It is
terrifying! But if I were a
woman, I could walk around
and nobody will know what I
am going through.
Anyway, let us bring the
focus back to sex toys. To
make life a little easier
and prevent men from
physically cheating on their
women and bringing home all
manner of diseases,
scientists and inventors
have been able to come up
with different types of sex
toys. I don’t know about
you, but I love scientists
and creative people. Life is
easier nowadays, thanks to
them. Sex toys help humans
and their relationships in
the following ways:
A. They save marriages.
B. They relieve sexual
tension, frustration and
stress whenever the need
arises.
C. Male relief from sexual
tension makes the world a
little safer for women, who
ordinarily would be at a
greater risk of being
harassed, molested and even
raped.
D. Sex toys aid sexual
release which in turn enable
men think clearly and make
better decisions. I have
found myself in several
situations where the
temptation to cheat was
quite strong and yet I
overcame it, simply because
I am not sex starved.
E. Provided you are not
sharing your toys with other
people, sex toys protect you
from HIV and AIDS by
preventing the
indiscriminate sex you would
have been having with people
of questionable status.
There is no question about
it. Sex toys are practical
solutions to a life laden
with sexual tension and
desire. Having acknowledged
this, let us examine basic
types of sex toys.
Masturbators: Masturbator
sleeves are toys designed to
enable men relieve
themselves of sexual
tension. All men masturbate
at some point in their
lives, if not all the time.
Masturbators were invented
to enable men do a better
job at what they are already
doing. Some of these
masturbators are built like
artificial vaginas, rectums
and mouths. They are usually
made of soft and artificial
flesh-like material called
cyber skin. Some of these
masturbators come in
different sizes and
penetrative lengths and most
of them are portable. Some
of them vibrate as well,
thereby giving pleasurable
sensations that feel almost
as good as the real thing.
LOVE DOLLS
Love dolls are life size
female dolls modeled for the
purpose of male sexual
release. They are usually
inflatable with a hand pump
and they feature vaginal and
other holes in all the right
places. Some of them look
really realistic with real
human hair and some vibrate
in all the necessary areas.
They are also portable so
you can deflate and travel
with them.
COCK RINGS
Cock Rings are round and
stretchy toys worn on the
base of the penis to enhance
erections. They prevent
blood from rushing back to
the body after you have
ejaculated, thereby ensuring
that you remain hard for an
additional twenty to thirty
minutes. Within this period,
you get to stimulate your
female partner so she can
climax as well. Cock rings
should not be worn for more
than thirty minutes to
ensure normal blood flow in
the body.
PENILE EXTENSIONS
Penile extensions are
rubber-like penis-shaped
toys worn over the penis for
the purposes of prolonging
your love making process,
lengthening the penis or
substituting for a week
erection. They are amazing
toys especially for older
men or for people who have
erectile dysfunctions. That
way, you are still able to
satisfy your lover and
retain your self esteem.
Even if you have no erectile
problems, this toy can be
worn after you ejaculate, to
prolong love making. Sex
does not have to come to an
end, the moment you
ejaculate.
Uche Edochie
MD/CEO
ZEE Virtual Media
www.zeevirtualmedia.com
08051924159, 01-7735024
email:
zeevirtualmedia@yahoo.com
Go Back to TOP
8. SEX AND
RELIGION IN AFRICA
We are going to be
talking about sex and
religion today. This might
seem like a strange topic to
you because you are probably
thinking that both issues
shouldn’t mix, but they are
intertwined. Infact, here in
Africa, the relationship
between sex and religion is
about the most significant
sexual topic any sex
educator can ever engage. Do
you know why? Religion is
such a big part of our
culture and it influences
everything else that we do,
including sex. To
effectively re-orientate the
Nigerian public towards
better sexual knowledge and
practice, one must
understand and deal with
significant religious issues
of profound consequence. Let
me tell you a quick story.
About three years ago, my
wife and I were just your
average couple who fought
over sex every now and then.
I accused her of rationing
sex and in turn, she saw me
as just another horny goat.
And then she came back from
church one Sunday and called
me to say that she will be
more sexually generous from
now onwards. The first thing
I said was, ‘Who is this
woman? You don’t sound like
my wife’. And then she
explained that their pastor
had chastised them and made
them understand that they
should aspire to satisfy
their husbands because it is
their religious obligation!
Wow! I don’t know about you
but whoever that pastor is,
I will like to take him out
for a drink! All these
years, I have been bitching
about inadequate sex and she
just wasn’t listening. It
took a pastor’s opinion to
make her accept the obvious.
Religion is undoubtedly a
big part of our culture,
Infact, the only other
cultural practice that can
rival religion in Nigeria is
probably corruption. I am
yet to figure out which of
the two is dearest to our
hearts, but I do know for
sure that Nigerians take
religion and corruption very
seriously. I don’t know how
we manage to combine both
some how, we pull it off. Do
you find this insulting?
Before you get mad, take
sometime and think about it.
And while you are thinking,
I will continue with my
writing. As I was saying,
religion is such a crucial
factor in the understanding
of a people’s sexual
inclinations, practices and
beliefs. Sex education has
failed in this country and
in Africa as a whole because
of our inability to
understand and tackle the
strong hold that religion
has over our sexual
knowledge and practices. My
guess is that we are all
trying to be careful so as
not to commit some religious
crime by educating ourselves
about sex, which is
senseless. But I will talk
about EVERYTHING that needs
to be talked about in due
course. No stone will be
left unturned. That is the
only way we can move forward
in our country. We must
address our greatest fears
and educate ourselves. So, I
will break the ice- as
always- and you can all hop
in if you care to. Brace
your selves cause I am not
holding back. It is going
down.
In any part of the world
where poverty is high, the
literacy level is low and
development is slow,
religions thrive. Look at
the number of churches in
Nigeria for instance. It has
become a multi billion naira
industry. Religion is man’s
instinctive way of engaging
an uncertain world, which is
not a bad thing. But
religion makes it easy and
convenient for us to mask
our ignorance and illiteracy
as well. That is where I
have a problem. This is
precisely why whenever
African’s encounter anything
they do not understand, they
brand it ‘demonic’. Of
course. It is easy to label
something demonic because by
doing so, you do not have to
task your brain to
understand it. Other
cultures are busy
researching all kinds of
phenomena and trying their
utmost best to know the
world we live in and find
answers to a myriad of
questions. They travel to
the moon and the ends of the
earth to learn more about
our universe and in the
process, they come up with
all kinds of ground breaking
discoveries in science and
technology. And what do we
Africans do? We sit back
with our cell phones and
enjoy the fruits of others
people’s labor while waiting
for the next new thing that
we can brand ‘demonic’. How
convenient…Am I pissing you
off some more? I hope so,
because I am not here to
entertain you. Truth is
painful to hear but it must
be said. Not very long ago,
we used to kill twins in
this country courtesy of our
religious philosophy at the
time. A lot of innocent
infantile blood was shed in
this country as a result of
our illiteracy. Can you
picture the brutality of
helpless babies being put to
death? It all happened. By
the time western education
came, we realized that there
is a biological explanation
for twins after all. Alas,
twin babies were neither a
curse nor a bad omen and the
devil had nothing to do with
their birth. So guess what?
Every woman I know today
wants to have twins.
Interesting…And then there
is the issue of female
genital mutilation popularly
known as female
circumcision. Believe it or
not, it is quite common in
our part of the world.
Imagine taking away from a
woman her ability to ever
enjoy sex. Can you believe
that this strange practice
is motivated by some moral
principle, which states that
women ought to be
circumcised to ensure that
they are not promiscuous?!
Yeah… infact, I have an idea
of my own. Why don’t we
amputate the arms of all
politicians before they are
sworn into office, to ensure
that they don’t steel money?
That should make sense by
the same token, right?
Ridiculous. So this is what
typically happens to a
circumcised woman. She grows
up sexually frustrated and
bitter. The ones that get
married have absolutely no
interest in sex because:
a- They have been
traumatized.
b- They are incapable of
sexual stimulation and
enjoyment so what is the
point?
Before too long then, the
husbands get mad, start
cheating on their wives and
eventually drive them away.
That is how family units
crumble, all because of the
senseless practice of female
circumcision.
Do you now understand where
I am coming from? Look, I am
a Christian and a catholic
to be precise. I go to
church every now and then. I
am not upset with religion.
I just dread the human
element that has made it
such a dangerous thing.
Truth be told, religious
interpretation and
translation will always fall
prey to human error. Look at
global terrorism for
instance. Religion when left
to the interpretation of the
wrong people is as dangerous
as can be. I am sure the
bizarre story of Reverend
King and the humans he set
ablaze- in the name of some
cleansing religious ritual-
is still fresh on our minds.
Can you believe that story?
There are so many like him
everywhere.
There is a lot of ignorance
and misinformation about
human sexuality in our
country and the most
alarming thing about this is
that educated people are
also responsible for it.
That’s where the problem is.
There is a prevalent
tendency to associate sex
with the negative which just
baffles me. Sometimes, when
I tell people that I own a
business that retails adult
sex products, they give me
this look that says, ‘Are
you serious? Why that sort
of business?’ This same
people forget or pretend to
forget that sex products are
the very things that they
have been using all these
years. Condoms, lubricants,
books, erection enhancers,
organ enlargers, wet wipes,
scented candles, massage
lotions etc are all sex
products! What a bunch of
morons! All around us,
people are dying of aids and
somebody is actually
wondering why my
organization retails
condoms? Is that a trick
question or is such a person
trying to score points by
acting dumb? You know, I am
a fairly reasonable guy. I
have great tolerance for
genuine stupidity. But when
smart and educated people
are faking stupidity, I
can’t stand it.
Sex when seen through a
religious lens- the way a
lot of us see it- is nothing
but scandalous, which is
sad. Anything sex related
makes most people
uncomfortable, although
these same people are having
sex. But they will tell you
that sex is demonic. That is
how come you hear people use
expressions like ‘the spirit
of sex’ or ‘the demon of
sex’. I believe in God like
a lot of you do and I also
accept that there is a
devil. Of course. Every
thing in life has an
opposite. But the sexual act
is nothing but a biological
necessity. That is what it
has always been and that is
precisely how I see it.
Every human being is born
with sexual desire. If we
did not harbor sexual desire
in us, our species will
become extinct. Just like
the dinosaurs of old, we
will cease to exist. Sexual
desire guarantees that
humans will be procreating
which is a fantastic thing
because the last time I
checked, if we are not
having sex, babies cannot be
made. How then can sex be a
bad thing, if it is the very
act that brought you and me
into the world? By saying
that sex is bad, you are
suggesting that your very
existence is illegitimate.
Does that make sense? So why
do we feel so guilty about
having, thinking or talking
about sex? The day I stop
thinking about sex is the
day my wife should panic
because it can only mean one
thing. Something is
seriously wrong.
A lot of us are living with
all kinds of sexual problems
while dying in silence. We
cannot reach for help. Why!
You have every right to
better your sex life and
protect yourself! NOBODY
should tell you otherwise!
When we were young, our
parents taught us that sex
is a bad thing and they were
wrong! Such nonsense! This
sort of misinformation has
become the bedrock of our
wobbling sexual foundation!
This is where the whole
problem started for us. I
have been researching this
and trying so desperately to
understand why people are
dying in record numbers in
our country due to AIDS, and
yet, you cannot even find
books on sex education being
sold anywhere! Not even in
Numetro stores at the Palms!
Can you believe it! Deep
within us, we actually
believe it is improper for
us to educate ourselves
about sex! Otherwise, how
can you explain the absence
of educational material in
this part of the world? I go
on the internet and I see
tons of educational books
written by western scholars,
but you will not find those
here, neither will you find
any written by our own
people!
Well, it is not difficult to
understand why things are
the way they are. It largely
boils down to the religious
strong hold, worsened
further by lack of education
and enlightenment. The
church does not encourage
the use of condoms, does
it?! Of course they don’t
because they are scared,
even though most reverend
fathers are sexually active!
I know some of them and I
know their girl friends and
children! They won’t tell
you to protect yourselves
with condoms because they
don’t want to be seen as
‘encouraging people to have
sex’ which leaves us with an
automatic death sentence in
this day of HIV and AIDS! If
there is one thing we know
for sure, it is that human
beings will have sex! You
cannot stop it, and why
would anybody want to stop
it anyway? Human beings are
sexual beings, just like all
living things are sexual
beings. All living things
are having sex and humans
cannot be an exception! God!
I am so mad… This doesn’t
make sense. For over thirty
years of my life, I have
been going to church. Not
once have I heard the words
‘sex education’ uttered by a
priest. Not once. Something
is terribly wrong here. The
church and similar religious
organizations must step up
and accept responsibility
for the spread of HIV and
AIDS in Africa. They share
the blame. Until they do
that, they have no
credibility in my eyes.
In conclusion, sex is not a
bad thing. It cannot be. But
like all human acts, there
are rules. That’s all.
Follow the rules and you are
fine. Take driving for
instance. There is nothing
wrong with driving if you
are old enough and
knowledgeable. But you
cannot drink and drive. You
should not drive if you are
feeling ill. These are just
a couple of driving rules
amongst many others. Sex is
like that too. There are
rules guiding sexual
intercourse but sex in
itself is not a bad thing.
Don’t have sex with minors.
Don’t have sex if you are
under age. Don’t sleep with
people’s wives or husbands.
Don’t sleep with your blood
brother or sister. Sex
between adults must be
consensual. Don’t molest or
rape people. Protect
yourself with a condom
always. These are some of
the basic sexual rules.
Follow these rules and you
are fine. There is nothing
to feel guilty about. People
send me emails asking if
oral sex and anal sex are
sinful and bad. Of course
not. Oral sex is sex and so
is anal sex. In the course
of this article, we have
been able to establish that
sex is not bad. How then can
oral sex be bad? It is sex
and there are different
kinds of sexual activity,
games and positions. Many
Christians use the bible as
a complete guide to sexual
understanding and practice,
which is downright
ridiculous! Such people are
quick to point out that this
one is not in the bible and
that one is not in the
bible. The bible is not a
sex manual! It is a book on
Christian spirituality! Is
the recipe for egwusi soup
in the bible? No. Why?
Because the bible is not a
cook book! Why then would
anybody expect to find
clitoral stimulants and sex
positions in the bible? If
you are hoping to someday
find a chapter in the bible
where Saint Paul will be
giving tips on oral sex and
vibrators before you are
convinced of their
legitimacy, you must be
crazy!
We go to school in this
country. It is time we used
our brains to distinguish
between the biological and
the spiritual. Thank you.
Uche Edochie, MD, Zee
Virtual Media
Go Back to TOP
9. FRIENDSHIP AND
SEXUAL GENEROSITY: THE
SAVIOUR OF RELATIONSHIPS
When I
write about sex, it is
obviously for the benefit of
our relationships and
families. But at the back of
my mind, I am aware that it
will take more than sex
products to fix a crumbling
relationship. Sure. When you
hear therapists and marriage
councilors talk about
spicing up your
relationships, they are
assuming- just like I do-
that every other necessary
structure that will enable
this spicing is already in
place. But in the real
world, we know that is not
always the case. A lot more
couples will be buying sex
products if their
friendships are great. But
as you know, long term
relationships are
characterized by couples who
barely tolerate each other.
People who have been in such
relationships describe it as
living under the same roof
with a total stranger. You
share the same space but
mentally, you are in
different worlds. Sadly,
that is very common and not
at all unusual. It is a
human condition.
It is easy to sell you
products. I know products
well and I know what works
and what doesn’t. But fixing
your relationship is
something that will require
all of your own effort- and
perhaps a little prompting
from us or any other
relationship councilor. That
is the subject of today’s
article. We will be talking
about the conditions that
need to be in place for
great long term sex and
romance to flourish.
Friendship comes first. If
you are always fighting with
your partner, it is
difficult to be sexual with
one another. If for
instance, a woman feels
maltreated or neglected in a
relationship, she is not
going to be in the mood for
sex- at least not with her
official lover. In the same
vein, if a man is feeling
overly criticized and
unappreciated, he cannot be
in a loving mood. There is
something I try to practice
with my wife. If she pisses
me off, I let her know. I am
never the kind of person to
carry a grudge. It poisons
me. If I am not happy about
something, I make it known
and the very process of
voicing it lifts half of the
burden; the whole idea being
to resolve the conflict
immediately. Because I am
aware of the benefits of
speaking out, I try to
initiate a dialogue aimed at
conflict resolution whenever
I notice that she is moody.
It might take a little while
for her to talk but
eventually, she voices her
cause of misery and if I am
wrong, I try to apologize.
Surely, it is not every
issue in a relationship that
can be easily resolved. My
point however is that if you
both make an effort to talk
about grievances, your
successes will be greater
than your failures.
I am not a relationship
guru, but you don’t have to
be one in order to succeed
in a relationship. You just
need to pay attention and
learn to read others. Aspire
to be a source of joy to the
people in your life and not
misery. Admit wrong doing if
you are guilty and
apologize. If you are upset
about anything, speak up.
When I was a kid, my mother
used to say, ‘never let the
sun set on your anger’. She
has no idea how this has
helped me in my life. I have
come to realize that couples
who don’t talk and resolve
conflicts immediately,
usually feud to a point
where they have no idea what
the cause of the problem is
anymore. If you are
observant, you will notice
that most of our parents
have this problem. They
always had these useless and
endless arguments over
nothing which just made
every other person around
miserable. That is what
happens when you let
grievances pile up. So,
aspire to maintain your
friendship and fondness for
one another, and every thing
else will fall in place.
Being friends means a lot of
things but it also means
acknowledging the fact that
you are different people and
therefore, you will not
always agree on everything
and that’s okay. You don’t
have to agree on everything.
You are not twins.
Sometimes, allow things to
be done your partner’s way.
A relationship is not a
competition and if you are
the type that takes pride in
always being right, you are
creating a major problem for
your relationship. Always
remember that for you to
always be right, your
partner must always be
wrong. Trust me, being wrong
all the time is a terrible
feeling for anybody and a
major cause of discord. Even
if you are the smartest
genius to ever work the
earth, you should be smart
enough to know that no human
being can be wrong all the
time and that sometimes, you
need to make your partner
feel right. That way, he or
she will be reassured that
they are also contributing
positively to your
relationship. Nobody wants
to be in a relationship with
someone who is always right.
Nobody.
Now, let us shift focus to
the second part of today’s
subject which is sexual
generosity. Sexual
generosity is a major
relationship builder. If
couples were devoted to each
other’s sexual happiness,
the world will be a much
better place and fewer
relationships will be
failing. Deliberately
depriving your spouse or
partner of sex or the joy of
exploration will do nothing
but ruin your relationship,
and a lot of people are
stuck in ruined
relationships. If your
partner makes a request or
wants to try something new,
think about it before
rejecting the idea. Ask
yourself questions like, ‘If
I try it, what do I have to
loose? If I try it, will it
hurt me or my relationship?
What if I try it and it
turns out to be the most
amazing thing yet? You never
know. Generally speaking,
women are the least
adventurous when it comes to
trying new things, which
creates lots of problems in
relationships. By
adventurous, I am not
talking about having sex in
a church or on a railway
track. But for crying out
loud, don’t expect that you
can have an exciting and
mutually satisfying
relationship by doing the
same things over and over
again.
In conclusion, sexual
generosity just implies
mutual commitment towards
each other’s sexual
happiness. There is
something people don’t often
realize. When your partner
suggests that you try
something new- maybe a new
sexual position, a sex toy
or whatever- and you are
willing, deep within him or
her, the feeling of being
loved and cared for
multiplies. The significance
of your willingness to try
that new thing goes beyond
your sense of adventure.
More than anything else, it
is an indication of your
commitment to the
relationship. It is a sign
that you care about your
partner. By being willing,
you make your partner feel
validated and wanted. You
make them feel like they can
trust you with their most
private selves. Always
remember that it is not easy
for anybody to request
something new. Deep within
each person is a fear of
rejection and being judged.
Be sensitive when you
respond to a partner’s
request and avoid criticism.
Your reactions have huge
psychological effects on
your partner. Most of all,
always remember that the
success of your relationship
lies in your willingness to
periodically reinvent your
sex life. When an invitation
to do something different
comes up, give a try at
least once, if it does not
endanger your life or
relationship. If you give it
your best and you still do
not enjoy it, your partner
will still appreciate you
for trying. That is all that
is required from anybody in
a relationship. The
willingness to try.
Uche Edochie
MD, zee virtual media
Go Back to TOP
10. Sexual Liberation: The
Path to Fulfillment
Every sexually active adult
would love to have a great
sex life. That includes all
the hypocrites out there too
who pretend not to be
interested in sex. You know
who you are and I am not mad
at you. Sometimes, I get
irritated by people like you
because I don’t know what
your problem is, but I am
not mad at you. Wait a
minute… I think I might know
what your problem is. Some
of you are afraid of being
judged by other people. Your
fear is that people might
think you are loose or
depraved if you show
interest in sex publicly.
You also worry that if
people get to know you and
all the freaky things you
love to do, perhaps they
will loose respect for you.
In addition to all of this,
a part of you thinks that
society might try to hurt
you or make life difficult
for you, if you are open
about your sexuality and
sexual interests. You will
be surprised to know that
people don’t care about what
you do. Surely, they will
gossip about you if they get
to know anything at all
about your sexual interests.
Of course. People always
need something to gossip
about. It is human nature.
But they don’t care about
what you do. They are more
worried about real issues
that affect their own lives
in real ways such as lack of
electricity, jobs, financial
security etc.
So, if you are to break free
and begin to explore and
enjoy your sexuality,
nothing should hold you
back. Don’t look for
approval from the outside
because it is not going to
come. I know it requires a
certain amount of courage to
embrace who you are and what
you feel. But it does not
require extraordinary
courage. It just requires a
first step in the right
direction and everything
else will follow. It was
like that for all the people
who never really tried oral
sex or a sex toy for
instance. The world did not
come to an end when they
made the choice to expand
their practices. On the
contrary, they are glad they
tried.
Africans will be having more
fun if they were sexually
liberated. We all desire
more exciting sex lives and
partners and it is possible
to have that. But first, we
need to understand where we
are, the genesis of our
inhibitions and how to move
forward. When I talk to men,
most of what I hear is that
Nigerian women are
unexciting and unadventurous
in the bedroom. They just
lie there and expect to be
entertained and sexed to the
point of orgasm without
making any contribution.
When I talk to Nigerian
women on the other hand,
they say that Nigerian men
are neither romantic nor
expressive. They complain
that our men hardly make
love to them the right way.
They want more. Well, there
is some truth to all of
these observations. I doubt
if it is as bad as we make
it seem, but I know exactly
what you are all talking
about.
I am sure you have all
observed the ease and
freedom with which
westerners express their
love for one another. We all
want that in our
relationships too. But the
freedom to effectively
express one’s self does not
come naturally to a
particular race. It is a
cultural thing and western
society has evolved a lot
more than ours. Westerners
raise their children to be
expressive without being
shy. Whenever I am with my
white friends, I am always
amazed at the boldness of
their kids and the ease with
which they socialize and
communicate with adults. All
these things affect humans
when they eventually grow
up. Our upbringing on the
other hand is very
different. Our parents were
always quick to yell, ‘Don’t
do this! Don’t say that!
Don’t touch this! Don’t
watch that!’ And so on. Your
style of upbringing and the
society in which you were
brought up matter a lot.
That is the truth. So, don’t
be in a hurry to criticize
your partners. The issues
here are bigger than them.
But the tendency to compare
is inevitable. We know for
instance that if a white
girl is in love with you,
she expresses it in the most
flamboyant way possible. She
will be all over you all the
time. She will hug, kiss and
smooch you in public. You
must both hold hands
wherever you go. White girls
scream a lot when making
love and they are willing to
do almost anything you want
to try! We African boys just
love that in a woman! But
guess what, if our women
suddenly start kissing and
smooching us in public, most
of us will find that
embarrassing! So, what’s
happening here? I thought
that was what we wanted? Do
you know why this is so? We
all have that problem of
expression! Expression is a
two way thing! If a girl is
all over you, will you
appreciate it or call her a
slut? Will we really embrace
that boldness or conclude
that our girls are just
showing off in public? You
see, it is more complicated
than you think. We are all
inhibited. We all need
liberation. Sexual
inhibition is not peculiar
to a particular gender.
Surely, one can effectively
argue that inhibition is
more amongst women. But
society is tougher on women
so why wouldn’t they
naturally tense up? It is
not easy for them and it is
not even that easy for you.
You might think that you are
such a pimp but if your wife
or girlfriend for instance
suddenly shows up in your
office with the intention of
screwing you right there on
your office table, you will
most likely panic and begin
to sweat! Yet you call her
unadventurous! Sexual
liberation must become a
societal movement in order
for it to succeed.
But, we need to take the
first step in breaking out
of our inhibitions. It is
human actions that form
societal practices. So, how
can we accomplish this? BY
DARING TO EXPRESS OURSELVES!
Ages ago, I used to be a shy
person too. So what happened
to me? How did I become the
founder of the digital
empire Zee Virtual Media? BY
DARING TO BE EXPRESSIVE!
That’s it. You have got to
reinvent your self in order
to become the person you
want to be. I wish I could
recommend some specific book
on sexual liberation but we
have run out of those for
now. However we have got a
variety of books and videos
that encourage sexual
expression in different
ways. You can get some of
those. There is nothing as
encouraging as reading or
watching other people do
that thing that you once
thought you could not do.
Also remember to be
supportive of your partners
when they are making an
effort to be expressive.
Considering our background
and all the inhibitions that
surrounded us when we were
growing up, this can’t be
easy for anybody. So be
patient and supportive.
Avoid being critical.
Criticism does not inspire
people. It just lowers their
self esteem. Remember that.
Find positive and loving
ways to make a request to
your partner. If you want to
try something new for the
very first time, don’t bring
it up during sex. Talk about
it before sex so that your
partner will have time to
think about it and mentally
prepare themselves to give
it a try. That is how come
new suggestions during sex
don’t play out very well.
They are too sudden and they
come out as criticism.
Always be sensitive and
supportive of one another.
Bye.
Uche Edochie
MD
Zee Virtual Media
Go Back to TOP
11. SEXUAL WISDOM: A GUIDE
TO RECLAIMING OUR AFRICAN
PRIDE
When I started ZEE Virtual
Media in February 2007, I set out to
achieve a lot of things.
Growing the business into a
successful house-hold name
and giving adults access to
the products that they need,
constitute the main
objective. But perhaps more
significantly was the
burning desire to engage the
business as a medium for
changing our collective
sexual habits and the
perception of Africans by
outsiders. Just like you, I
get really pissed off each
time I watch CNN or BBC only
to have negative images of
Africans staring back at me.
I hate it and still do. Not
because the information
carried on television about
Africans is fake, but
because only the negative
things about us end up on
their news. You never see
anything positive about us
on TV and there is so much
to Africa and Nigeria than
just the bad stuff. The
media is a powerful thing.
It is bizarre to imagine
that television is able to
shape the minds of people
who have no real or actual
contact with Africa, but it
does… unfortunately.
What does it mean to be
African in today’s world? Do
you ever stop to think of
other people’s
interpretation of your
blackness or Africa ness? I
am not talking about the
fact that Nigerians are
generally disliked by the
rest of the world. I am
referring to the global
attitude and perception of
Africa and its people. You
see, to the world outside
our continent, to be black
is to be a source of worry
and heartache to ‘others’.
‘African’ is another term
for decadence, hopelessness,
primitive, diseased,
problematic, confusion, war
torn and helplessness,
amongst other things. The
African race is generally
perceived as the one drawing
the rest of the human race
behind. We are seen as a
burden to the world. Forgive
me if I sound different
today, but it is hard not to
get a little political in
this particular article,
because everything is
related. But this is a sex
column, so let me put things
in the required sexual
perspective for you. AFRICA
IS SEEN AS THE FACE OF HIV
AND AIDS. I am sure most of
you know this already and
trust me, that is not good.
It has far reaching
consequences. It is one
thing to hold our heads high
wherever we go, but it is
another thing to have others
treat us as equals.
So, how does this make you
feel? Angry? Demoralized?
Inspired? Or perhaps all of
the above? You know what I
have come to realize? The
bottom line for us Africans
is not really how we feel
about all of this, but what
we are prepared to do in
order to change the aspects
of these perceptions that
are true. Surely, the number
of HIV and AIDS cases in our
part of the world is a lot
more than the ones recorded
in other continents. Perhaps
we can blame it on lack of
education, ignorance and
irresponsibility. Perhaps.
But it is more than that. As
most of you probably know by
now, it is possible to get
infected with this virus
even when you do not sleep
around. For instance, if you
are married, chances are
that you do not use a condom
when having sex with your
husband or wife, right? This
just means that you are just
as vulnerable as any other
person. If your partner is
cheating on you without
protecting him or herself
all the time, you are at a
very high risk of getting
infected, especially for the
women. And trust me; most of
us will be cheated on in our
life time. That is a fact.
So, do you see where I am
going with this? When I
write about sex toys and all
that, it is not all about
sexual satisfaction. It is
about sexual discipline,
education and security as
well. Do you remember the
incident in Libya some
months ago where hundreds of
innocent children where
infected with HIV by
careless doctors and nurses,
who were not paying
attention to hygiene? The
world is a scary place. It
is going to take A WHOLE LOT
more than just condoms to
get rid of HIV and AIDS.
Let us briefly go back to
the perception of Africans.
I got so pissed off about
the image of the African
that I made sex education my
priority in life. That is
how I started writing these
articles and this is just
the beginning. I hate to
talk about my future plans
but, what the hell, I might
as well tell you. I will
write books and make
documentaries that will
revolutionize sex education
in this country. It must be
done. Our parents were too
embarrassed to do it, and
millions have died as a
result. In a country where
people are so embarrassed
about sex, somebody has to
talk about it. Not talking
about it has cost us a lot.
Surely, the message, ‘AIDS
KILLS. USE A CONDOM’, does
not even begin to scratch
the surface in terms of sex
education. Sex education
means getting to know
EVERYTHING you can about
sex. The more you know the
better for you.
Comprehensive sex education
involves a total life style
make over. Talk is cheap. We
must practice what we
profess. Sex education is
about knowledge of human
sexuality, but more
importantly, it is about
VALUE and RESPECT for the
human body. If you RESPECT
your fellow human being, you
will not sexually assault,
molest or harass them in any
way. If you VALUE your life,
you will protect yourself
always, and I am not just
talking about the use of
condoms. Based on what we
have learnt from the Libyan
incident, it takes more than
just condoms to control this
disease. We have to pay
attention to everything
else. Everything. The
needles we use, our tooth
brushes, tooth picks etc.
Infact, we have to be
careful around blood or
anything capable of drawing
blood. Some years ago, I was
buying catfish from a market
when the lady selling it
accidentally cut her self
with her knife and bled all
over the fish. Guess what I
did? I turned around and
left. I love fish, but I
will not have the blood of a
person that I do not know
her HIV status spilled on my
fish. WE JUST HAVE TO BE
CAREFUL AND HYGIENIC IN ALL
WE DO.
Below are excerpts of
information published in the
ZEE Virtual Media catalogue,
intended to aid sexual
discipline and
responsibility:
* If you are a sexually
active adult and you own
only three items in your
entire life, a box of
condoms should be one of
them. Don’t be caught
without protection.
* Be mindful of having oral
sex with strangers whom you
do not know their HIV
status. If you have got the
tiniest cut or bruise in
your mouth in such a
situation, you are at risk
of an infection.
* If during foreplay with a
woman, she suddenly changes
her mind for whatever
reason, please respect her
decision and back off. NO
means NO. Give her some
space while she figures out
exactly what she wants. The
same goes for men.
* Never engage in sexual
activity with persons below
eighteen years of age, even
if they want you to.
* Children are a lot smarter
than we are willing to
admit. Do not give birth to
them and send them into the
world without educating them
appropriately about human
sexuality.
* ZEE Virtual Media is
committed to a dignified and
responsible sale of sex
products to adults 18years
and above. Please use the
products you buy from us
responsibly.
* At Zee Virtual Media, we
encourage safe sex, sexual
exploration within
individual boundaries,
togetherness and excitement
among couples, family
planning and sex education
for both young and old.
It will require a huge
collective effort to battle
HIV and AIDS and change the
image of the African. But
with perseverance, it can be
achieved. Be dedicated and
be safe in all you do.
Uche Edochie
MD
Zee Virtual Media
Go Back to TOP
12. SHORT CUTS TO SEXUAL
FULFILLMENT
Every now and then, I try to
sit back and analyze our
most important sexual needs.
The idea behind these
analyses is of course to
enable me identify relevant
subjects when writing these
articles. Each time I do
this analysis, it
immediately dawns on me that
they are many…our sexual
needs are too many. It is
impossible to tell you
everything you need to know
about sex in just one
article. So, we will take it
one subject at a time- as I
normally do- until I finish
writing my first book.
Today, we will be examining
short cuts to sexual
happiness, satisfaction and
ultimately fulfillment.
General speaking, the idea
of short cuts to anything is
discouraged by society. Part
of the reason for this is
that it is widely believed
that anything that comes
easily cannot be very good
or beneficial and that it
will have pitfalls too.
Well, that is true for a lot
of things…but not for
everything. When for
instance my best friend and
I are headed to the palms in
Lekki to go and have a good
time (usually on weekends),
and we suddenly realize that
heavy traffic jam has
paralyzed movement- as it
does many a time- it usually
feels great when my friend
figures out a short cut that
will bring us there on time.
This typically means
maneuvering through some
crazy routes with untarred
roads, but Obi always
figures out a way to get us
to our favorite joint, in
spite of the insane traffic.
He has lived on the island
all his life so he knows
every short cut. So, today I
am going to give you tips on
short cuts to sexual
satisfaction as well. We
will begin with the basics.
Getting in the Mood
When we were young, getting
in the mood was never a
problem because as
teenagers, we were at our
sexual peaks. We were all
stuck with midnight hard-ons
that usually led to wet
dreams, all because of some
neighborhood girl we were
‘dying for’ back in the day.
Do you remember? Back then
(even though we were legally
prohibited from sexual
activity of any kind) there
was no such thing as having
difficulties getting in the
mood because we were always
in the mood. Infact, the
difficult part of life as a
horny teenager was getting
out of the mood. And then
time passes by, you mature,
get into the university,
graduate, get a job, get
married, roll out a bunch of
kids and get burdened with
life and responsibilities.
Amidst all of this, some of
us lose our libidos as well.
This is such a common
problem….very common.
If you have difficulties
getting in mood for sex
occasionally, it does not
necessarily mean that
something serious is wrong
with you. Stress, fatigue,
alcohol, bad diet and lack
of exercise are major
contributors to the loss of
libido- both for men and
women. In order to regain
your libido the hard way,
you must change your present
circumstances which may
include cutting down on
alcohol intake or quitting
it entirely, exercising,
getting adequate rest,
living a less hectic life
and eating healthier foods
that are high in
fruits/vegetables and low on
sugar. While the above is
advisable and recommended,
there are also additional
remedies that give quicker
results. One of them is
aphrodisiacs. Not just any
aphrodisiac but a herbal
supplement with the
appropriate nutritional
support that blends
naturally into your system.
A very good example of such
an aphrodisiac is Adam’s
Desire for men. This is a
doctor recommended herbal
aphrodisiac that restores
your libido, prolongs
intercourse, stamina, energy
and even fertility. Ask for
it at
www.zeevirtualmedia.com.
Always remember to consult
your doctor before taking
aphrodisiacs. If you are
hypertensive, diabetic or
suffering from some kind of
heart problem, aphrodisiacs
are not safe for you. Infact,
sex itself might not even be
a good idea under some of
these circumstances.
Another short cut for
getting in the mood is
through adult movies. A lot
of people consider it
controversial but adult
movies are essentially
visual aphrodisiacs. They do
the same thing that drugs
and creams do but in a
different way. Nothing
excites like watching other
people having sex. It is
true. There are folks who
cannot take a pill to get in
the mood because of a health
condition of theirs, but
they feel more comfortable
watching a movie and getting
in the mood by doing so.
Oral aphrodisiacs and movies
are all effective remedies
when there is a loss of
sexual interest or libido.
It all comes down to what
works for you. There are
also stronger prescription
drugs that help put you in
the mood such as Viagra,
Levitra and Cialis. But
these are prescription drugs
that only medical doctors
should recommend. As you
know by now, Zee Virtual
Media is not a pharmacy and
I am not a medical doctor.
So, we don’t write
prescriptions, we don’t
diagnose illnesses and we do
not sell drugs. If you have
a sexual condition that you
feel requires treatment with
drugs, please go and see
your doctor. It is up to him
to make such diagnoses and
recommendations.
For the women, there are
effective aphrodisiacs as
well such as the Spanish fly
and certain herbal teas
which put you in the mood
when you want. And then
there are also the non oral
aphrodisiacs for women. They
are called clitoral
stimulants and they come in
the form of gels and
lubricants which enable
women enjoy sex to the point
of orgasm. Locally, people
around here call them sex
sweeteners, which is such a
bush name. Ask for The G
Spot cream, Feminine Arousal
Gel or Tasty Twist Orgasm
Enhancer at
www.zeevirtualmedia.com.
These are all great and safe
aphrodisiacs for women that
guarantee sexual enjoyment
and satisfaction.
The Mega Male Enhancing
Serum, our best selling
penis enlarger at Zee
Virtual Media is also an
erection enhancer for men.
While using this product,
you will notice that after
you ejaculate, you are still
hard and ready for more
sexual activity. WOMEN LOVE
THAT. When they are upset
after men ejaculate, it is
mainly because they know
that your penis is going to
become soft afterwards and
that will be the end of sex
for that particular moment.
But the Mega Male Enhancing
Serum, Adam’s Desire and a
variety of Cock Rings help
you maintain an erection
after ejaculation. Another
great product that helps
prolong ejaculation is a
cream called Love Stuff All
Night Erection Cream. This
is a crazy desensitizer that
enables men last longer. It
doesn’t give erections. It
just delays your ejaculation
when you have an erection
already. If you are looking
for a gel that gives
erections, then go for the
Dickalicious Penis Arousal
Gel. Remember to always call
us at Zee Virtual Media to
enquire about product
functions. My staff will
readily answer all of your
non medical questions.
SEX TOYS
Perhaps the most popular
route to sexual fulfillment
is through the use of
vibrators, masturbators and
similar adult gadgets
popularly known as sex toys.
These products enable
sexually active adults
achieve sexual release and
relaxation as often as is
necessary, with or without a
partner. They have been
proven to be very effective
and disease-free both for
you and your relationships.
Uche Edochie
MD
Zee Virtual Media
Go Back to TOP
13. DOES SIZE REALLY MATTER?
THE TRUTH ABOUT SIZE
For centuries, the debate
about size and its
consequence has raged all
over the world, and we are
not just talking about penis
size. We are talking about
quantity in general, but
with specific reference to
human sexual organs. Humans
will always desire more.
That is part of why size
will always matter. Who
wouldn’t want to live in a
bigger house, drive a bigger
car and have a bigger bank
account than they have now?
Size matters primarily
because of how it makes us
feel. Let me repeat this
again: SIZE MATTERS BECAUSE
OF HOW IT MAKES US FEEL. The
thought of moving into a
bigger house tricks the mind
into believing that life is
going to be dramatically
better in that huge mansion.
Of course this is not
necessarily the case. While
big things do have their
advantages, they also have
disadvantages. Maintenance
for instance, is a major
disadvantage big things have
although this does not apply
to the penis. There is no
research or theory asserting
that a huge penis needs more
maintenance. A big penis is
definitely heavier when
fully erect but that’s about
it.
Women love big penises. They
may not admit it all the
time, but they love it. Do
you ever watch females
closely when they give blow
jobs in adult films? They
handle big penises with so
much excitement, as if they
are trophies or some highly
coveted objects- they might
as well be. A big penis may
not guarantee sexual
enjoyment, but it is still
preferred by the women.
While doing my periodic
online research, I do find
that women consistently
express a preference for
thick penises in particular.
According to them, they love
how a thick penis fills
their vaginal void and
stimulate them. Well,
well…what do we have here?
Did you here that? It is the
opinion of the women, not
mine. Even from my personal
experience, my wife always
gushes with amazement when
we are making out. When she
can’t hide it any more, she
will just blurt out, ‘This
thing is huge’. Well, who
wouldn’t be impressed? Daddy
is a tripod! If you amputate
one of my legs, I can still
run a marathon!
WHAT WE LOVE ABOUT SIZE
We love big things. We all
do. Bigger may not
necessarily be better, but
bigger is bigger. Sometimes,
that’s all humans care
about. Look at female
breasts for instance. It is
a major object of man’s
desire and the bigger they
are, the more we lust after
them. Why are bigger breasts
better? Oh, I can write a
thesis on that, but for the
sake of space, I will
summarise my points. We love
big breasts because they
fill the bra and give women
the kind of curves that
appear as if they are on the
verge of popping. Big
breasts are more fun to play
with because of their
mobility. The earth’s
gravitational pull on them
heightens their sexiness and
alluring movements. Just
look at the way big breasts
jiggle and bounce when women
are walking or running? What
a beauty. Most of all, we
love the way big breasts
rock back and forth during
intercourse. And then there
is the touch. The way they
feel when you caress and
grab them…wow… that feel of
feminine softness, delicacy
and warmth is to die for.
When you grab big boobs,
they fill the hands in a
manner that is pure
voluptuous fun that just
sends a surge of excitement
down your spine, all the way
to Mr. Johnson! Big boobs
are eye candy. I can take
forever to describe them but
I have to stop here. I am
beginning to sound like a
porn star. Anyway, is there
still anybody out there
wondering why bigger is
better? I rest my case.
ORGAN ENLARGEMENT
Now let us focus on the
claim that penis enlargers
do not work. To those making
this claim, I have a
question for you. How many
of these enlargers have you
used? There are hundreds of
penis enlargers in the
market. Have you tried all
of them? So when you speak
with certainty that penis
enlargers do not work, what
is your argument based on? I
have done a lot of research
too on enlargement and I
have used a few products
myself. Based on personal
experience, this is what I
know for sure. Over eighty
percent of the penis
enlargers in the market do
not work. It is not a
secret. Go to the internet
and research it for your
self. But, is it possible
for one to enlarge his penis
with a pill or serum? Of
course it is. I have used an
enlargement serum that works
and I still do. It is called
Mega Male Enhancing Serum
and it is our best selling
product at
www.zeevirtualmedia.com. It
is the only penis enlarger
on our shelves besides the
penis pump. Why? That is
because it is the only
product that I have
personally confirmed. There
is a tendency to think that
all business people are
heartless, money-hungry
sharks who will sell
anything at all to make
money. At Zee Virtual Media,
we don’t import unreliable
products and sell to people.
The success of Zee Virtual
Media has been based on
customer satisfaction. If
the people who buy from us
weren’t happy with their
results, they will not keep
on buying, and we will not
be doing this well. We are
very honest about the
capability of the products
we sell. Based on my
research and personal
experience, I have also
found this to be true about
enlargers. They do not give
permanent results, and we
tell our clients upfront.
This just means that in
order for you to maintain
whatever results you have,
you must remain on the
product, which is fine by
me. I am very comfortable
with the one that I am
using. It is not a pill. It
is a cream. Surgery is the
only known procedure that
gives permanent results. We
tell our clients all these
things. Penis pumps do
enlarge the penis as well,
but the results are
temporary as well. There are
also certain penis
enlargement exercises that
work. If you want to know
more about those, get the
book at
www.zeevirtaulmedia.com. The
people who tell you that
penis enlargement is a scam
are right about one thing.
Most of the penis enlargers
in the market do not work.
That is precisely why we
have only one tested and
trusted brand on our site.
Penis enlargement is very
possible and this is how it
works. An erection is
achieved by the flow of
blood to the spongy penile
tissues known as the corpus
cavernosum and the corpus
spongiosum. When these
tissues are filled with
blood, you have an erection.
Effective penis enlargement
products therefore work by
targeting these penile
tissues and increasing their
sizes while simultaneously
aiding greater blood flow in
the body. The bigger this
spongy tissue is, the more
blood it can hold and
consequently, the bigger the
erection. Simple as that.
Penis enlargement is not a
scam. It does work if you
are using the right product.
Uche Edochie
MD
Zee Virtual media
Go Back to TOP
14. SEX PRODUCTS AND YOU:
UNDERSTANDING THE ZEE
VIRTUAL MEDIA
AGENDA.
When I
opened zeevirtualmedia.com,
an outfit that retails a
variety of sex related
products, I knew that I had
a huge task ahead of me- and
I am not referring to
commercial success. Business
has been very good. The
greater challenge here is
cultural reorientation. I am
talking about the daunting
task of changing the sexual
understanding, habits and
routines of this generation
and the ones to come.
Now this is not an easy
thing to do. It is almost
like trying to change a
people’s culture. That is
not easy. But if we are to
progress in our
relationships, marriages,
families and as a society in
general, some things will
have to change. Now, there
are obstacles that will get
in the way of change. That’s
for sure. There is the
obvious religious barrier
for instance. That’s a major
one. There is also the
barrier of our collective
fears and sexual
inhibitions- largely as a
result of the way we were
raised. For a lot of people,
picking up the phone to
order for a pack of condoms
is just terrifying. These
and a few others are some of
the things that need to
change around here if we are
to progress in our
relationships, our sex
education and in our battle
against sexually transmitted
disease and unwanted
pregnancies.
Now there are a number of
ways these changes can be
achieved. Educating our
people about human sexuality
is a big part of it- at
www.zeevirtualmedia.com we
have books, catalogues and
articles that do just that.
Making sex products
available for purchase is
also very important. We are
doing that already. Creating
a safe and trusting
environment under which
people can place their
orders is also part of it,
all of which we have done at
www.zeevirtualmedia.com. We
have structured the shopping
process in such a way that
you can place an order for
your products wherever you
are in Nigeria, and we will
deliver to your door step!
Now that is shopping made
easy! So far, it is working
very well. Last but not
least is talking about sex.
I am sure you agree with me
when I say that we do not
talk about sex enough in our
country- at least not
publicly. This has a lot to
do with the way we were
raised. Our parents never
talked about sex (at least
not in front of us) neither
did they educate us about
sex, which was a BIG mistake
on their part. Today,
generations are being wiped
out by AIDS and most
marriages are rapidly
crumbling, largely because
of the education parents
never gave. So, part of our
agenda at Zee Virtual Media
is to get people talking
about sex. When people gain
comfort in talking about
sex, they are able to
achieve the following:
1. They gain the courage and
ease with which to educate
their kids about sex and
related issues.
2. They are able to discuss
their problems and concerns
with people who can help
them and they are also able
to summon the courage to
purchase the products that
they need. That way, you
don’t have to suffer in
silence when you can easily
reach out and get helpful
information and useful
products. At
www.zeevirtualmedia.com , we
are always available to
answer basic questions and
offer advice on products
that suit your specific
needs.
3. Talking about sex related
issues gradually demystifies
the disease and stigma
associated with HIV and AIDS
and enables us relate better
with people living with the
disease or virus.
4. Talking about sex with
the right people is one of
the fastest ways of
educating yourself about
sex.
And so on. But for us to
achieve the above goals,
important questions must
first be answered. We know
that a lot of people have
questions regarding our
business. Here are some of
the common questions that I
have been asked in the past:
a. Why open ‘this kind of
business’?
b. Isn’t this sort of
business immoral?
c. People like you want to
corrupt our world, Don’t
you?!
d. Do we need sex products?
These are just a few of the
questions that some people
have asked us me the past-
when they do find the
courage to do so. Some of
them are great questions
while others are just ….
stupid. But of course, I
will like to answer all of
these questions and more
because sex education is our
priority. So, let’s start
with these past questions.
Question number one:
- Why open ‘this kind of
business’? Because just as
human beings need cell
phones, tooth picks and
frying pans amongst other
things, they also need
condoms, lubricants, books,
lingerie etc. If we all
agree that condoms are
essential for all sexually
active adults, then someone
has to import and sell these
products, don’t you think?
Is that a problem? Obviously
not.
- Question number two:
Isn’t it immoral to do this
kind of business? Being
Nigerian, I am sure you can
understand when I answer
this next question with a
question of my own. So my
answer will be, ‘isn’t what
immoral?’ Four months ago
when Zee Virtual Media
kicked off, we started by
advertising through text
message broadcasts. This
medium was quite effective
and people started ordering
for products right away. But
there were others who had
different responses to our
adverts. One of such people
sent us a text message that
said:
Please I keep on getting
these messages from you
people. I am a pastor’s wife
and I find this sort of
thing to be unchristian.
When my staff read the text
message to me, I could not
help but laugh. Initially I
wanted to reply pastor’s
wife and tell her the
following:
Dear pastor’s wife, thank
you so much for your feed
back. You have sex with your
husband (the pastor), don’t
you? Of course you do. Is it
immoral for you to have sex
with your husband? I assume
the answer to that is no.
Therefore how is it immoral
for me to sell you products
that will enable you have
better and safer sex with
your pastor husband? You
see, your take on the issue
is uninformed and
unintelligent, am I wrong?
If I sent you a gift from
our store consisting of
classy Victoria Secret
lingerie, you will love it
won’t you? I take that as a
yes. Is it then immoral to
sell lingerie? I assume the
answer to that will be an
obvious no. So then dear
pastor’s wife, what is your
point? Oh, I forgot, you
don’t have any!
This was the reply that I
could have sent her, but I
changed my mind. It is cruel
and I don’t want to be
cruel. We want to inform
people about our products
and the general nature and
relevance of our business
without making them feel
silly- even if they are
indeed very silly.
Unfortunately, what people
like pastor’s wife do not
understand about religion is
that no amount of it can
replace basic education. If
you want to be a civil
engineer and instead of
studying hard, you spend all
of your time praying in
church, you will definitely
fail your exams. You see
what I mean? Religion cannot
replace literacy. We need to
go to church/ mosque and
worship. Absolutely. We also
need basic education about
all the other issues that
affect our lives as well.
That is why we sell amazing
books and publish free
catalogues with educational
content at
www.zeevirtualmedia.com.
That is why I am writing
this article.
Question number three:
People like you want to
corrupt our world, don’t
you?’ An NDLEA official once
asked me this question last
year when I went to clear
some of our goods and pay
our duties and all of that.
People like me want to
corrupt our world? Are you
kidding me? Sorry to
disappoint you, but our
world was corrupt long
before I came along! That
job is taken. I have got
other plans for our world
which includes ensuring
basic sex education for kids
and adults, ensuring the
availability of sex products
for the benefit of adults
and their relationships and
aiding sex therapy and
sexual safety for all
people. Now that is a cool
thing to do, isn’t it?
Question number four:
Why do we need this sort of
business?’ Question number
four does not even deserve
an answer because it is
downright stupid. It is like
asking, ‘Why do we need cell
phones? Why do we need fuel?
Why do we need electricity?
Infact, why do we even need
food and clothing and
shelter etc.?’ BECAUSE WE
NEED THEM! Period!
There is so much to talk
about but I will write again
in two weeks. Hopefully, the
writing will become a
regular thing. Until then,
if you want to know more
about our products, visit
www.zeevirtualmedia.com. If
you have any comments on the
issues discussed, please
send your reply to
zeevirtualmedia@yahoo.com.
Your feed back is necessary.
We need to get talking about
the sex related issues that
affect us so much because
human beings are sexual
beings and that is OKAY.
Nobody has to feel guilty
about wanting, having and
enjoying sex. It is part of
being human. For us to keep
our relationships and
families together and remain
uninfected by all manner of
sexually transmitted
diseases we need the right
information and products.
Uche Edochie
MD/CEO
Zee Virtual Media
01-7735024
08051924159
Go Back to TOP
